Even before I was pregnant, I have always prayed for my future kids. I prayed for their health and their future in school, with friends, their marriages... Those prayers just intensified once I was pregnant, mainly because of all the things you learn about your baby, week by week. But as I watched lots of tv shows on the Discovery Health channel, I saw lots of kids, different kids. I remember watching a show about children with down syndrome, saying prayers at the same time, asking God for my baby not to have that syndrome... but then, a few seconds after I prayed for that, I stopped. I regretted my words and identified the feeling behind it. Fear. Pure fear. And I just asked myself: Why not? Why wouldn't God want me to have a unique baby like those on tv?
I understand that as a Christian, we ask and believe God will do something for us. But sometimes what we ask God is not really the best thing for us. I had always prayed for a healthy baby. All that mattered was that she would be healthy. Really? Is that all that matters? People tend to think like that. And it is SO WRONG.
That day, watching the tv, I realized that God might want to give me a special baby and that I should be really comfortable and happy about it. I should know that God's decisions for my life are the best ones.
I kept that thought of the possibility of having a special child just to myself. I did not comment anything with my husband, until the day we had Isabelli. I remember him telling me: "I was worried about how you would react once they told you everything Isabelli had, but I was very surprised with your reaction". He said that because my reaction was: "Ok, her right hand was affected, but the left hand is perfect. Ok. Good. Her feet are totally twisted, but the doctor assured me she will walk. Ok. We're good. That's fine". And I believe that even if the situation was worse, God would give me the same peace He gave me that day. Even if there were no hands or feet to my baby, God knows I would carry her in my arms until the day I died
I feel blessed, yes, blessed! God has given me the best daughter in the whole world. He has chosen my husband and I to be her parents and I am forever thankful to Him, for thinking that we are worth being her parents.
The day Isabelli was born, my husband was remembering something he once heard his father preach about: "Don't be thinking of WHY did something happen to you, think of WHAT FOR". That is exactly it. God is doing great things through our hardships, we just have to be open to learn from everything we are faced with.
Why you??? Well... Why not?? ;)